From: "Douglas Oxley"
Subject: Tuesday Movie Night - X Men: The Movie
Date: Monday, July 17, 2000 12:36 PM
Okay, so I'll admit that last week's email had some of you a little baffled... Part of the little game that I was playing was that every quote was from "Jerry Macguire". Also, everything "you" said was a quote (from "Jerry Macguire"). And I sort of did a profile of Cameron Crowe in the middle, mentioning all of the films that he has made except one ("Jerry Macguire"). And I also thought it was funny that I didn't use the most cliche of the quotes from that film ("Jerry Macguire"), which is "Show me the money!".
So this clearly demonstrates that I am involved in this adventure up to the point that I've gone to inane absurdity. Though I must admit that it did pose somewhat of a writing challenge to tie all the quotes together and to deliver the "normal" (for lack of a better word) TMN stuff. It was also written in dialogue format, which helps me keep focused on the style of writing that I'm going for. I gotta work to keep it real, dog.
"So that's all I have to say about that."
This week's film is "X Men: The Movie". This one is supposed to be very popular, and might be the type of flick that sells out. It's playing at SouthPointe at 7:20. So here's my plan. I'm going to go over as soon as I can get home and change clothes. It'll probably be about 6:00 when I get to the theater to buy a ticket. Then I'll go over and hang out at Panera Bread, where I'll probably have some form of Turkey on Sourdough. I might also have a cup of soup. Whenever I feel like it (but not before 7:00 and not after 7:15) I'll head into the theater. This extension of the normal five minute rule is to account for not wanting to have to deal with the backpain that accompanies staring at the screen from the front left corner of the theater. Don't forget, I'm the one who makes the rules (as will be explained in detail later). If you're planning on going, then please let me know, and I'll try to meet up with you.
By the way, SouthPointe Cinema is at 27th & Pine Lake Road.
Last week's film was reasonably crowded, too. It was "Scary Movie", and it was in the same offensive summer flick genre as "American Pie". Now, don't get me wrong. Neither of those films offended me. It's just that scenes from these types of flicks push the envelope of taste. (The only recent flick which I was offended by was "Fight Club" which has an ambiguous moral message about violence.) No, "Scary Movie" is no "Fight Club". It's just about showing flashes of male nudity and having tasteless humor. Being the enlightened intellectual that I purport to be, I am supposed to find appeals to the most basic of gags to be beneath me. However, the movie made me laugh and laugh and laugh some more.
People have also compared "Scary Movie" and "American Pie" to "There's Something About Mary" and "Me, Myself & Irene" because of the bodily function sight gags used in all of them (think hair gel, ice cream, and apple pie) However, the genres that are the background for the offensive humor are different in each case. "Mary" and "Irene" were more or less love stories. "American Pie" was a coming-of-age story, and "Scary Movie" is a parody of the Nineties horror genre. People just can't get past the tasteless sight gags (that are soooooo very funny) to see the films for the story that they tell.
In addition, the quality of the story adds to the total draw. "Mary" is the 45th highest grossing US film ever with $176 Million. "American Pie" is 189th at $101 Million. That makes "Mary" 144 films better than "Pie". The reason why is because "Mary" has a good story.
Here's the rules. Numero Uno! If you would rather not receive this email any longer, then please reply and tell me so. I will gladly remove you from the list. No problems. No awkward moments between us. No big whoop. Personally, I'm not sure if I want to get them any more. Deux! Show up at least five minutes before the flick starts so that we can actually go in and see the film. Three! Actually, one and two are the only rules that matter.
So please join me for "X Men" at 7:20 at SouthPointe.
Doug
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http://incolor.inetnebr.com/oxley/
"7's the key number here. Think about it. 7-Elevens. 7 doors. 7, man, that's the number. 7 chipmunks twirlin' on a branch, eatin' lots of sunflowers on my uncle's ranch. You know that old children's tale from the sea. It's like you're dreamin' about Gorgonzola cheese when it's clearly Brie time, baby."